Source: YouTube

Spring has sprung and that means baseball season is here! Instead of Smash Mouth’s “Walking On The Sun” it’s Young Jeffrey’s “Should Bench That Kid But He’s The Coach’s Son”

Lyrics:
Spring has awoke! And now my nightmare’s been evoked
I signed my kid up for the Local Little League
But half the kids, out there just crying & defying
Watch ’em swing & miss ten times while the ball’s set on a tee

Their Tiny fingers Grasp to the wrong end of the bat
How many runs was that?
No one knows, they don’t Keep Track!
It always Happens parents yappin’ unconventional tips:
“Eyes on the Ball, Be Like Shakira now & Swing with ur Hips!”

At 2nd Base, Bad Bounce!
Ball Hits the Runner Down South
Out in Left field there’s Bryce…
Head turned, Chasin’ Butterflies
Just like our old College Days, they’re Headed Straight for 3rd Base!
We’ve never Won
Should bench that Kid but he’s the Coaches Son

“No Jayden, run the other way! The other way!”

Ya Got the know it all dopes,
Who Shout out to the dugout
Puffy Chesting while Suggesting
They know more than the Coach!?
In their fold out chairs, they wine all Down the Foul Line
More Shrieking & Clacking than Abu From Aladdin!

Yea, some kids act like Clowns
Little Jack just pulled his Pants down,
Keep reminding one “Please don’t eat dirt off of the Mound”
But each team is gonna get One All-Star kid
Does more smashing & dash than Flash and Hulk ever did!

I’m Sad to Say, Somehow, Hard Liquor’s Not Allowed
Big Stanley Cup by my side, Let’s say “It Ain’t Filled with Sprite”
And if the Parents are Brave, They’ll do the World’s Saddest Wave…
By Standing up, Looks like a Water ripped in a Cup!!

(wooo!)
(oh come on now parents, the seven of us can do better than that! Ready? One, Two, Three! Woooo!)

Mothers will smolder at the young hot assistant coach
The Catchers Mom, dropping Hints she down to Motorboat…
I heard a Cheer? Look Over, some Kid just Scored a Homer!
Now the Team Mom’s All Jacked Up on her
Fourteenth DIET SODA!

Every at-Bat, She Claps Louder than an IMAX!
But that Mama brought the stacks of Rice Krispy Snacks!
So Grab your packs & just relax
Cuz Even Last Place, Still gets trophies & Free Pizza just to participate!

So Don’t Delay, buy Shout!
or those Grass Stains won’t Come Out
I’d love to Know the bright Guy,
who made all Baseball Pants White?
And while my Kids at the Plate
I got one eye on his Face,
The Other One…
is streaming MLB on FS1
The Little Leagers Season has begun!
Where Every Hit’s an Infield Home Run
Just sat on Metal Bleacher’s in the Sun
That Snack Shack Corn Dog’s, Given me the Runs

*Corn Dog Noise​s*

OH GOD…

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