Can’t Be A No-Show (Sabrina Carpenter Parody) | Young Jeffrey’s Song of the Week

Is 2024 about to be the “Summer of Introverts?” Instead of Sabrina Carpenter’s “Espresso” it’s Young Jeffrey’s “Can’t Be A No-Show!”

Lyrics:
Lately…
Dinner Parties, Hangin’ Round Folks
Just the Thought makes me Stressed So,
Introvert Me’d, Rather Stay Home,
Like I’m on House Arrest OH!
Weddings of Friends, Lotta People
Make me turn Green, like Pesto
RSVP’d, Saying I’d Go,
Secretly hope they Cancel

I Shy Away From Conversation
I Really Miss, Covid Isolation
Gotta Text from my Boys!
Cuz they’re out Pub Crawling
Say: “I’m on my Way!”
But I’m Not Coming

Got all the weird excuse for Ya,
Invent a Sick Nephew just for Ya
Bounce like a Kangaroo, Before ya…

Went to this Barbecue, for ya
Hid in the Bathroom to avoid It,
Wart Cream, I’ll Self Remove Me, for ya

Sorry…
Don’t invite me to Fireworks Shows…
Rather do Sparklers Solo
Hear the Loud Screams, from the Gym Bros
Cut off my EARS like Van Gogh
Too many Clowns & I’ll Just Ghost,
Disappear like James Franco
Hour Long Drive, Uber Ride Home,
Always request “NO CONVO”
Like I’m Bruno, Encanto!

No Baseball Games, Cuz I’m no Swinger
As an Amish Boy, I’d Skip Rumspringa!
Don’t Attend the State Fair, Cuz I ain’t Corndoggin’
No Funerals, unless I’m in that Coffin!

Sorry we can’t Grab food Together
It’s just my Sofa view is better
I’ll Tandem Hit Drive-thrus, Whatever,
(SEPERATE CARS, YEA!)

Superman he’s my dude, I’ll Tell ya
Fortress of Solitude, I’m Jealous!
Gatherings of More than TWO, Repel Us

I’ll Be
Visit the Beach, Dipping my Toe
Too many Feet, Dip Out Yo!
Herded like Sheep, Open til Close
Busy Friday at Costco!
Not Into Mobs, No Sopranos,
Need Space like, Han Solo
Mailman Rings, at the Front Do’
I just Pretend I’m Not Home

Wish I Could be, Bubbly & Bold,
But I Ain’t No Ted Lasso
People I Meet, Think I’m More Cold,
Than the Winters, in Glasgow
Summertime Fun, Baby I know,
That I Can’t be a no Show…
But I might Leave, Pretty Quick Tho
So I Can Decompress-Oh…

Macauley Culkin’s Comfort Zone
Mmmmm, Yea, Thats Me, Home Alone